I began last week on a series on being a lady. In part 1 I talked about the importance of the father, teaching about the Heavenly Father, and being a positive role model for our little girls. They need that validation from both their father and their Heavenly Father in order to build their confidence early. Their dependence in God helps them understand that if they can’t do it, with God, they are then able to. This week, I want to go into that little girl growing up and becoming a lady and what is needed in order for her to grow up into God’s lady.
Growing Up
As an educator, one of my favorite things to share with young people during events like back-to-school bashes or other community events is a quote from Colossians 3:23-25 which says (ESV), “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. For the wrongdoer will be paid back for the wrong he has done, and there is no partiality.” I like to share this because as children get older, they become more conscience of their peers and what their peers think of them. They begin to fall into the “wrong crowd” because they are trying to prove something. First of all, that validation talked about earlier helps children to not fall into this so easily and the other thing: teaching them diligently. We can’t just say something to our kids and then tell them to figure out the rest. As they grow up, we have to continue to teach as situations change and/or become more complex. If children are taught to the point that they understand that their works are to serve God, it helps them a whole lot as they get older. Their school work, chores, extra-curricular activities should all be done in a manner to please God. As long as their focus is to please God, pleasing their peers is not as important because they will understand that their peers do not compare to God. This is strictly to say that this will help in their decisions and they begin to feel convicted when they do wrong and will want to strive to do right. But it begins with teaching them.
As girls are growing up, they should be taught how to carry themselves as a respectable woman, or lady. This is important because what you put out is what you get back. 1 Timothy 2:9-10 (ESV) says, “…likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold and pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness---with good works.” Now in this scripture, Paul was addressing the standards of a place of prayer because this particular place was out of order, so he was putting order back. Now, I know fashion from back then is different from fashion now and certain things now would not have been ok to wear then, but we all know what is too much and what isn’t! Women, if you are going to dress your daughters, first make sure you are dressed accordingly (you’re the model), and make sure they are dressed respectably also. What I take out of this scripture is the fact that if you are professing Christ, professing Godliness, then it needs to show. If you are being what I like to call “flashy” then your mind is about you, not God and what attention you can get from others, not pleasing God. I love how Proverbs 11:22 (NSV) say it, “Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman without discretion.” Wow. Women we have to make the right choices, for ourselves and for our daughters so that they will know how to carry themselves throughout life.
Standards
Women, we all know we should have a certain level of standards. There are certain ways we should carry ourselves. For those of us with that validation and diligently taught the commandments and word of God, having standards and sticking to them is easier, but for those of you that did not have these foundational things growing up, but is working to live in line with the word of God, you have to have standards and you HAVE to stick to them. If we are going to dress respectably, we need to also actually respect ourselves. Dressing respectably isn’t a punishment or meant to feel like you can’t be happy. It shows everyone that you have respect for yourself and that they better have respect for you, too! Proverbs 4:23 talks about guarding your heart and affection. You can’t just keep putting yourself out there to everyone you meet. That isn’t protecting yourself. You guard it, you protect it, you respect it. When others see that you have this standard, if they will rise to it (or try) or walk away. If they walk away, let them. They are telling you right there that they do not respect you enough to meet your standards.
1 Corinthians 5:33 (NSV) says, “Don’t be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals””. Ladies, be careful with who you keep as your company. In other words, choose your friends wisely. Some people you have to just keep at a distance or drop altogether. I practiced this even in high school, not knowing about this scripture. I had a friend that was too promiscuous for my comfort. I wasn’t that type of girl, and I really didn’t want people thinking I was or even that I was ok with it just by my association with her. I quickly began to distance myself from her, not completely shutting her out because I wanted to continue to be an example for her and plant that seed of Godliness. But if you are in a situation where you strongly feel you need to let them go completely, please do. You can plant that seed and close the door behind them. =) But we have to be careful who we keep as our company.
Now, speaking of that promiscuous friend, LADIES, no sex before marriage! We are ladies, we must conduct ourselves as such. Some of us may have messed up, but get it right! And keep it right! 1 Corinthians 6:18 (NSV) says, “Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexual immoral person sins against his own body.” Fornication is included in this. If it is not between a MAN and a WOMAN that are MARRIED, run from it! Ladies, if you are married (to a man, I have to specify that), enjoy yourselves! For the marriage bed is undefiled, “for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous” Hebrew 13:4 (NSV).
Continue reading this series in God’s Lady Pt. 3 (Relationships and Marriage)
Feel free to leave a comment or your experiences!
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